Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Why does it have to hurt so much?

Do you ever find yourself, the night after a spanking, thinking that spanking really hurt. Can I have more please?

Last night I got spanked at bedtime. It was the first day of my new schedule, and I failed pretty appallingly. Instead of only being on the computer for three hours, I think it was well over five (I blame the Israeli government for that too!). Instead of taking breaks after every one of those hours, I completely disregarded them. I totally forgot to lay down for one rest period, much less for the three 15-minute periods I was supposed to. I did remember to do some yoga and physical therapy, but forgot my meditation and QiGong. And, of course, I was late to bed -- seven minutes past the grace period.

In short, I blew it.

So A. administered the ruler* after pulling down my jammie bottoms while I buried my face in my pillows. Quite severely too. At one point I thought he was going to break it. Needless to say, it hurt. A lot.

But upon waking up this morning (yes, it was really in the AM too - 11:30!), all I could think of was how much I really want a good, long spell over his knee. I just wish it didn't have to hurt so much. Except, of course, if it didn't hurt, I wouldn't feel very satisfied.

Why does it have to work like that?
*This ruler is no namby-pamby love-pat stick. It's 24-inches and stings like a motherfucker.


bridget said...

I'm with you Natty! I really really wish it didn't have to hurt so much too. In all my fantasies I knew it hurt, but I never really knew how much it hurt until I tried it out. And discovered that having spanking fantasies does not make you a masochist.

I am the worlds biggest wimp.

sex toys said...

i felt as if my story was told here. spanking fantasies have always been in my imagination to get hurt is a part of it and now i am cool with it....

Jigsaw Analogy said...

yeah, it sucks that the relief of punishment seems to require that punishment to actually be painful.

and it *also* sucks that you're feeling as crummy as you are. (i don't know about you, but i don't find consistent enough improvement from following the proper health regimens that it's a big incentive in itself. sure, i can rest and keep myself from getting worse, but it's such a small difference, and i so often crash even when i've done everything "right" that i often can't be bothered....)

EmmaJane said...

Yeah it would be great if you could get to that after glow and lovely cosy feelings without the pain.

And I too always forget how much it hurts. Always forget that this thing I crave is utterly painful and I'll want it to stop as soon as is starts. But as you rightly point out as soon as it's done with we want more.

Hmmm viscous painful circle!

Natty said...

Bridget -- I know. The fantasies always lull me into a false sense of security. My godfather always says that imagination is a whore.

sextoys -- Welcome! Glad you've made peace with the pain. :-)

JA -- Yes, I think I'd be more willing to accept the pain if it wasn't for the fact that I live with pain all the time (and lately, more specifically pain in my ass - sciatica and SI joint dysfunction).

This was the first week back on schedule after a hiatus of many weeks for precisely the reason you describe. And I'm still not sure if returning to the schedule will help all that much. But I do seem to do my PT et al when I have a box to tic. And mostly go to bed earlier and spend less time online.

EmmaJane -- It would be nice, wouldn't it? I love the buzz I get from a spanking -- especially the buzz from a punishment spanking. But I do hate the pain.