Thursday, April 10, 2008

Medication blues

My apologies for the lack of posting lately.

A few weeks back I had to stop taking an immune supplement that was giving me more energy but eating away at my stomach. My energy level has since taken a nose dive.

Morphine has begun turning my nights into everything from vivid Alice-in-Wonderland surreal (and Lewis Carroll would know a thing or two about opiate-inspired dreams) to horrific Quentin Tarantino-esque nightmares that make me afraid to go to sleep.

Another drug, Reglan, has turned my days into stiff, achy, listless napfests. And when I am awake, I wander aimlessly through the television and Internet -- though my time online has recently been reduced the no more than three hours per day in an effort to conserve my limited energy.

I've discontinued the Reglan a few days ago, but don't have a lot of options when it comes to the morphine as without it, I'm in a great deal of pain. There probably are other drugs available, but I doubt my insurance would cover them, especially as it was a long, hard fight just to get them to cover the morphine. Indeed, I'm pretty sure Satan himself spawned health insurance companies from the blackest pit in the bottom most depths of Hell. And at the end of the day, then decided that even the most evil of Hell's inhabitants didn't deserve to suffer the fate of being HMOed.

But not all the dreams have been bad.

This afternoon I dreamt that A. and I were driving to the coast and "Little Surfer Girl" was playing in the background, except that it was "Little Ocean Girl" for some reason in my dream. And we stopped and I was bent over some sort of metal bar and he was whipping me with a switch. It was so vivid that when I woke up, I was quite surprised to be curled up in bed in my apartment.

Only more 18 days until it will be a little closer to reality.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Natty I am so sorry you are not feeling well! :( I hope it resolves very soon! Sara

Indy said...

Thanks for the update, Natty. Very sorry that the medication battles suck so much, and I hope your vivid dreams begin to feature a bit less Alice and Quentin and a lot more A.

Anonymous said...

Natty,

Ditto the previous posters, word for word. Sending well-wishes your way.

I hope your drs manage to find a medication that will work for you. I had morphine once and it was...interesting.

Take care, and A will be there before you know it!
Lele

Anonymous said...

Oh, I'm so sorry you've been having such trouble with the meds. Been there. And morphine? *shudder* I really hope you're feeling much better soon.

Jigsaw Analogy said...

Ooooh! Only **five** days 'til A is back with you! Hardly any time at all!

Sorry you're having to deal with all of the medication stuff. It sucks, and makes me really leery of trying any meds for my fibro, because the side effects of the meds so often seem to exacerbate the things that most bug me about the fibro. :(

Anyhow. Hope you're feeling better, or that you're able to get through the next five days really quickly. Ideally, both of those!

Anonymous said...

I, too, am so sorry that things have been so bad for you. It just isn't fair.

How many more days now? :)

Indy said...

If I can add correctly (far from a foregone conclusion), then it's only three more days until A arrives. Glad you'll have him around to take care of you through the medication battles, and I hope you get enough relief to enjoy the time you have together.

Take care, Natty.

Indiana

Anonymous said...

I agree pharmacy companies are the worst. Alot of the stuff they sell they barely even test. Its a definite shame.

Anonymous said...

Just dropping by to say hi...

miss kitty